‘Shattered and Lost Love’ – Painting by Joylene Lobo

‘Shattered and Lost Love’ – Painting by Joylene Lobo


Artist: Joylene Lobo, Bondel, Mangalore

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So you have that gut feeling that he stopped caring about you, but why? Why did he stop caring? Hello, Welcome to Hideshade.com. So without further delay, let’s start.

#1 All talk and no action

First he realize that you’re all talk and no action. This is what happens, when you play games. At the beginning you acted confident, you were busy with your schedule. You did not have too much time to spend with him. Your mood was positive, you were talking about your hobbies and all your goals for the future.

After about a month into this relationship, he noticed you wanted to spend more and more time with him. You started to act insecure. Your goals and hobbies were replaced by sitting on your couch watching television. And your language became more now on the negative side yet what attracted him to you in the first place was your go-getter attitude.

But he now realized that it was just an act to impress him, that it was all just a game to look cool and to look high value.

#2 Chasing

The second one is you have been chasing him. If you have shown your guy that you have been so available and ready for him, you have been inviting him over to your place, calling him first, texting him first, calling and texting more than he is and have not given him a chance to pursue you. At this point you turned him off.

It is, women were not designed to chase after a man. To chase after a man is actually a masculine quality that you should let go of if you want to be cherished and pursued by a man.

#3 Whole cake

The third one is you have made this man into your whole cake. If you make your guy into your whole world and your whole everything, you will have nothing left of your own and what will happen next you will be living a life on his terms on his schedule on his desires. When a man sees that you are at his mercy he will get turned off and start to lose respect for you as you have no self left.

He will not care about you anymore because what is there to care about when he does not really know what or who you are anymore. All he will know is that you live for him.

#4 Bad manners and bad hygiene

The fourth one is bad manners and bad hygiene. When he first met you, you were at your best. Being polite, you had nice manners, you were feminine as well as you took care of yourself in means of hygiene. You looked neat and proper, you took a shower after going to gym, you had clean clothes and clean hair.

Yet after a few months I started taking him for granted and yourself for granted in such ways as not taking a shower, not getting your hair done anymore, letting yourself go, as well as at the restaurants you started being rude screaming at the table, rude at the bank, yelling at your parents or siblings in front of him.

Your whole being changed for what he once saw in you and this is not what he signed up for in the first place.

#5 You depend on him for your own happiness

The fifth one is you depend on him for your own happiness. This goes hand in hand with making him into your whole world. You expect him to be responsible for making you happy, instead of taking control and responsibility of your own life.

A man will care for you when you let him do it from his own free will. If you do not care enough to be responsible for your own life, why should he care? As this puts a lot of pressure on a guy and all he will want to do is run. It’s not his job to entertain you and make you happy. Take responsibility and work on your own happiness. Then you will be happy. That is when he will want to spend more time with you.

Please, I would really recommend to get a self love course where a coach talk about how to go for your goals, for your dreams, how to love yourself and how to make yourself happy.

Finally I get to graduate in Los Angeles, I have a son in college and I have to pursue my dream because if I don’t, what am I teaching my son? So I moved to a abroad country with seven hundred dollars in my pocket and my little son.

And I had to fight the good fight because people tell me I can’t, you can’t do this, you can’t. Are you crazy? Are you moving to abroad with your child? You will never make it.

I was twenty-six when I decided to go here. There’s the age thing. Oh you are very old. If you listen to people and allow people to project their fears on you, you will not live. What if I believed in those people who told me that when I got pregnant at university I would not finish? I crossed that stage with my son on my hip and got my degree. My diploma.

I didn’t listen to detractors when they were like you were too old to go to abroad. If you don’t reach 25, you won’t. I’ll be forty-six this year, I’m just touching the surface. I just started and that’s my message for today’s children, they think very little on Instagram.

You know everyone wants instant fame. It didn’t take me, it didn’t happen. I am coming here, it is 20 years of hard work to prove that my voice mattered. Right? Did they always pay me what I should have? No. But that was not my fight, the fight bigger than that.

Get the big picture and stay strong. I have a voice everything in life that comes to you is going to come through you, it starts inside you, you know if it is another’s love of a man whose love has to start inside you if you don’t know how to take care of yourself Or take care of yourself first. You know how you are going to teach another person that you know that if you do not fight after pursuing your goals in life with such tenacity, what are you?

Do you leave your partner to admire? It all starts with you know that you are the temple and you have control that you are in a bad situation, it is up to you to get out of it, you cannot give another human the responsibility for your happiness.

So thank you so much for reading if you liked this article please press like. Let me know in the comments below what did you think.

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‘Shattered and Lost Love’ – Painting by Joylene Lobo
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